When the bus came to take me to Tampines Interchange I was surprised to see it totally filled with AHS people that I could not enter at all. A second one came behind soon, but it was more of them, all clad in the 50th Anniversary shirts. I could not find anyone I know to ask, so i waited till nightime before I asked my junior.

Apparently, totally unexpected on my part, they had this Human Wheelbarrow Race (which I have no freaking idea how it looks like or how the students were supposed to do). In fact, they broke the Guinness World Record for the Largest Human Wheelbarrow Race!

WTF!

After that, they went back to school for Teachers' Day celebrations (because they have exam tomorrow -.-''). And apparently, they got our Singapore President's wife to be the guest-of-honour.

WTF!

I wonder what in the world is the school coming to.

*****

I jinxed electronic devices. So far, three of those, my Dreamcast, my Zen Micro, and my z520i, that came into my possession all suffered a certain degree of damage. One of my Dreamcast controllers is spoilt, and games can only work if the cd flap thingy is not totally closed. The headphone jack of my Zen is also damaged, and after a free consultation which states that repairs will cost $139, I decided that we will repair it ourselves. I do not need to elaborate anymore on my z520i.

Just last week the new Yellow Pages phone book came, together with a coupon of a free phone, with an upgrade of my brother's phone plan. My mother declares that he has to use the phone anyway, and so I got my new phone last Saturday. A Samsung SGH-X680.

I have total faith in Samsung. Not just for the fact that the first syllable of its name sounds like my surname, which others take the opportunity to make fun of, but also because my previous two phones before the z520i were both Samsung (haha, also from Yellow Pages coupons) and both worked very well. The phone is perfect so far.

And so, I end my 8-month relationship with Sony Ericsson. Not that its phones are bad, but maybe it is inferior to Samsung when it comes to clamshells.

Anyway, I hope I can stop jinxing anymore devices I get my hands on.

*****

Official lessons ended last week. Somehow the last day of school felt like any other day. Either the past two experiences in primary and secondary school are enough, or we are simply too busy with exams to care about it. Or maybe, two years are too short to develop any hard feelings.

For now, its studying, studying, and more studying.

I have never been more stressful.

Prelims venues are out.
Notes are neatly categorised and filed.
Tutorials are almost done.
No more new topics.
Half empty lecture theatres. (Because of the point above)
Students hugging very, very thick files. (Because of the second point)
Revision notes and past year examinations papers filled up the space in my file left behind by the old tutorials.
"Excuse me, I have to lock the classrooms now."
"Students who wish to order dinner, please come over to the General Office now."

The signs have surfaced. The warcry has sounded. The second most important examinations is arriving. Very soon. After almost 18 years, I am finally on the last lap of my race. I will be going through one of the most stressful, worrying, and to some extent, frightening, times, because my disappointing performance over the past 1 year 8 months means that I have alot more to catch up than my fellow friends.

It seems like I have always aimed at the bull's eye, but missed because I did not put in any effort. Maybe I lack the motivation to put in any. Now I'm back again aiming at the centre, I'm putting in more effort, though I'm not sure if it is motivation, or simply because everyone else can hit the centre, and I don't want to lose my face.

Fighting for Face. How pathetic.

Maybe I should find a better reason to deceive convince myself. Like, bringing glory to my family.

Yucks.

Whatever the reason is, I have to study now. Study like there's no tomorrow. Study like I need it more than my rice and water. Study like there's no day and night. Study like I will be dragged to some deserted place and get shot if someone catches me without any notes. Everything else have to wait. Whether is it National Service, scholarships, healthy lifestyle, love, overfishing, terrorism, or number of planets we have in our solar system.

I'm scared. Scared of losing the momentum. Scared of missing the bull's eye again (while everyone else hits it). Scared of seeing the disappointed look on my mother's face. Scared of being mocked at by others. But I have to go on.

Let's hope the good ones will remain in top form, and the not-so-good ones will catch up to be in the league as well.

Good luck to everyone.

Well, my friend sent me this which I thought was quite interesting. Instead of spamming everyone I might as well put it here. Its accuracy remains a question mark though. Read for the fun of it!

星座統計出爐～真的很準唷！

> >Q 1：什麼星座的人最情緒化？
> >
> >第 1名 處女座 1,573 票 17% 第 7名 牡羊座 613 票 6%
> >第 2名 巨蟹座 1,021 票 11% 第 8名 金牛座 605 票 6%
> >第 3名 雙魚座 958 票 10% 第 9名 射手座 598 票 6%
> >第 4名 雙子座 810 票 8% 第10名 天秤座 559 票 6%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 792 票 8% 第11名 獅子座 501 票 5%
> >第 6名 水瓶座 661 票 7% 第12名 魔羯座 364 票 4%
> >
> >Q 2：什麼星座的人最有異性緣？
> >
> >第 1名 獅子座 2,001 票 28% 第 7名 牡羊座 529 票 7%
> >第 2名 天秤座 746 票 10% 第 8名 水瓶座 342 票 4%
> >第 3名 雙魚座 652 票 9% 第 9名 金牛座 293 票 4%
> >第 4名 雙子座 595 票 8% 第10名 巨蟹座 278 票 3%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 568 票 8% 第11名 魔羯座 249 票 3%
> >第 6名 射手座 564 票 8% 第12名 處女座 198 票 2%
> >
> >Q 3：哪個星座的女生最難追？
> >
> >第 1名 處女座 2,329 票 23% 第 7名 金牛座 720 票 7%
> >第 2名 天蠍座 1,426 票 14% 第 8名 射手座 566 票 5%
> >第 3名 魔羯座 862 票 8% 第 9名 天秤座 509 票 5%
> >第 4名 雙子座 807 票 8% 第10名 巨蟹座 452 票 4%
> >第 5名 水瓶座 780 票 7% 第11名 牡羊座 399 票 3%
> >第 6名 獅子座 768 票 7% 第12名 雙魚座 398 票 3%
> >
> >Q 4：哪個星座的人神經最大條？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 1,109 票 22% 第 7名 水瓶座 332 票 6%
> >第 2名 牡羊座 680 票 13% 第 8名 魔羯座 305 票 6%
> >第 3名 獅子座 464 票 9% 第 9名 天秤座 278 票 5%
> >第 4名 雙魚座 436 票 8% 第10名 處女座 257 票 5%
> >第 5名 金牛座 402 票 8% 第11名 巨蟹座 219 票 4%
> >第 6名 雙子座 338 票 6% 第12名 天蠍座 191 票 3%
> >
> >Q 5：哪個星座的人說話最毒？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 2,693 票 27% 第 7名 水瓶座 650 票 6%
> >第 2名 雙子座 1,121 票 11% 第 8名 牡羊座 637 票 6%
> >第 3名 處女座 1,031 票 10% 第 9名 天秤座 457 票 4%
> >第 4名 射手座 848 票 8% 第10名 金牛座 408 票 4%
> >第 5名 獅子座 704 票 7% 第11名 雙魚座 357 票 3%
> >第 6名 魔羯座 674 票 6% 第12名 巨蟹座 354 票 3%
> >
> >Q 6：什麼星座的人最不喜歡受拘束？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 1,864 票 24% 第 7名 天蠍座 371 票 4%
> >第 2名 水瓶座 1,720 票 22% 第 8名 巨蟹座 358 票 4%
> >第 3名 雙子座 811 票 10% 第 9名 雙魚座 301 票 4%
> >第 4名 獅子座 516 票 6% 第10名 處女座 214 票 2%
> >第 5名 天秤座 495 票 6% 第11名 魔羯座 211 票 2%
> >第 6名 牡羊座 475 票 6% 第12名 金牛座 163 票 2%
> >
> >Q 7：什麼星座的人最專情？
> >
> >第 1名 魔羯座 2,366 票 27% 第 7名 水瓶座 407 票 4%
> >第 2名 處女座 1,059 票 12% 第 8名 雙魚座 393 票 4%
> >第 3名 天蠍座 932 票 10% 第 9名 牡羊座 376 票 4%
> >第 4名 金牛座 929 票 10% 第10名 射手座 374 票 4%
> >第 5名 巨蟹座 772 票 8% 第11名 天秤座 359 票 4%
> >第 6名 獅子座 436 票 4% 第12名 雙子座 329 票 3%
> >
> >Q 8：哪個星座的人最懶惰？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 682 票 16% 第 7名 雙子座 296 票 7%
> >第 2名 金牛座 620 票 15% 第 8名 牡羊座 261 票 6%
> >第 3名 雙魚座 428 票 10% 第 9名 天蠍座 222 票 5%
> >第 4名 天秤座 343 票 8% 第10名 巨蟹座 221 票 5%
> >第 5名 獅子座 316 票 7% 第11名 魔羯座 201 票 4%
> >第 6名 水瓶座 314 票 7% 第12名 處女座 191 票 4%
> >
> >Q 9：哪個星座的人最癡情？
> >
> >第 1名 獅子座 1,771 票 17% 第 7名 牡羊座 669 票 6%
> >第 2名 雙魚座 1,481 票 15% 第 8名 處女座 604 票 6%
> >第 3名 巨蟹座 1,091 票 11% 第 9名 水瓶座 437 票 4%
> >第 4名 魔羯座 1,023 票 10% 第10名 射手座 427 票 4%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 1,017 票 10% 第11名 天秤座 284 票 2%
> >第 6名 金牛座 791 票 8% 第12名 雙子座 259 票 2%
> >
> >Q10：哪個星座的人最愛吃醋？
> >
> >第 1名 獅子座 1,704 票 29% 第 7名 魔羯座 246 票 4%
> >第 2名 天蠍座 1,373 票 23% 第 8名 牡羊座 220 票 3%
> >第 3名 處女座 439 票 7% 第 9名 雙子座 189 票 3%
> >第 4名 巨蟹座 438 票 7% 第10名 水瓶座 182 票 3%
> >第 5名 金牛座 371 票 6% 第11名 天秤座 181 票 3%
> >第 6名 雙魚座 302 票 5% 第12名 射手座 171 票 2%
> >
> >Q11：哪個星座的人最獨立？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 607 票 14% 第 7名 處女座 269 票 6%
> >第 2名 魔羯座 605 票 14% 第 8名 雙子座 261 票 6%
> >第 3名 水瓶座 534 票 12% 第 9名 金牛座 236 票 5%
> >第 4名 獅子座 528 票 12% 第10名 天秤座 186 票 4%
> >第 5名 射手座 495 票 11% 第11名 巨蟹座 133 票 3%
> >第 6名 牡羊座 308 票 7% 第12名 雙魚座 115 票 2%
> >
> >Q12：哪個星座的人最愛睡？
> >
> >第 1名 天秤座 884 票 12% 第 7名 射手座 528 票 7%
> >第 2名 雙魚座 799 票 11% 第 8名 水瓶座 479 票 6%
> >第 3名 雙子座 759 票 10% 第 9名 處女座 452 票 6%
> >第 4名 金牛座 747 票 10% 第10名 天蠍座 422 票 5%
> >第 5名 巨蟹座 600 票 8% 第11名 魔羯座 415 票 5%
> >第 6名 獅子座 550 票 7% 第12名 牡羊座 399 票 5%
> >
> >Q13：哪個星座的人最易犯桃花？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 2,069 票 18% 第 7名 獅子座 588 票 5%
> >第 2名 水瓶座 1,696 票 14% 第 8名 牡羊座 491 票 4%
> >第 3名 天秤座 1,445 票 12% 第 9名 魔羯座 404 票 3%
> >第 4名 雙子座 1,437 票 12% 第10名 金牛座 366 票 3%
> >第 5名 雙魚座 1,365 票 11% 第11名 處女座 366 票 3%
> >第 6名 天蠍座 925 票 8% 第12名 巨蟹座 342 票 2%
> >
> >Q14：哪個星座的人最沒有安全感？
> >
> >第 1名 雙魚座 1,080 票 15% 第 7名 天秤座 519 票 7%
> >第 2名 雙子座 932 票 13% 第 8名 水瓶座 429 票 6%
> >第 3名 巨蟹座 793 票 11% 第 9名 金牛座 376 票 5%
> >第 4名 射手座 722 票 10% 第10名 魔羯座 339 票 4%
> >第 5名 處女座 598 票 8% 第11名 獅子座 318 票 4%
> >第 6名 天蠍座 542 票 7% 第12名 牡羊座 281 票 4%
> >
> >Q15：哪個星座的人得失心最重？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 827 票 16% 第 7名 雙魚座 300 票 6%
> >第 2名 獅子座 760 票 15% 第 8名 水瓶座 298 票 6%
> >第 3名 處女座 665 票 13% 第 9名 牡羊座 282 票 5%
> >第 4名 魔羯座 440 票 8% 第10名 天秤座 275 票 5%
> >第 5名 巨蟹座 329 票 6% 第11名 射手座 241 票 4%
> >第 6名 金牛座 319 票 6% 第12名 雙子座 219 票 4%
> >
> >Q16：哪個星座的人最幽默？
> >
> >第 1名 雙子座 1,122 票 18% 第 7名 獅子座 372 票 6%
> >第 2名 射手座 1,072 票 17% 第 8名 天蠍座 336 票 5%
> >第 3名 水瓶座 624 票 10% 第 9名 雙魚座 305 票 4%
> >第 4名 巨蟹座 596 票 9% 第10名 魔羯座 217 票 3%
> >第 5名 牡羊座 585 票 9% 第11名 處女座 204 票 3%
> >第 6名 天秤座 562 票 9% 第12名 金牛座 189 票 3%
> >
> >Q17：哪個星座的人最不容易說出內心的話？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 1,037 票 19% 第 7名 金牛座 353 票 6%
> >第 2名 水瓶座 757 票 14% 第 8名 雙魚座 264 票 5%
> >第 3名 魔羯座 594 票 11% 第 9名 天秤座 259 票 4%
> >第 4名 處女座 434 票 8% 第10名 射手座 258 票 4%
> >第 5名 巨蟹座 426 票 8% 第11名 獅子座 247 票 4%
> >第 6名 雙子座 404 票 7% 第12名 牡羊座 171 票 3%
> >
> >Q18：哪個星座的人最愛腳踏兩條船？
> >
> >第 1名 雙子座 1,204 票 21% 第 7名 獅子座 302 票 5%
> >第 2名 水瓶座 1,000 票 17% 第 8名 天蠍座 290 票 5%
> >第 3名 射手座 828 票 14% 第 9名 牡羊座 188 票 3%
> >第 4名 天秤座 499 票 8% 第10名 巨蟹座 143 票 2%
> >第 5名 雙魚座 499 票 8% 第11名 魔羯座 143 票 2%
> >第 6名 處女座 491 票 8% 第12名 金牛座 134 票 2%
> >
> >Q19：哪個星座的人最夠朋友？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 1,908 票 22% 第 7名 天秤座 486 票 5%
> >第 2名 巨蟹座 1,058 票 12% 第 8名 雙子座 410 票 4%
> >第 3名 獅子座 852 票 10% 第 9名 金牛座 374 票 4%
> >第 4名 射手座 803 票 9% 第10名 魔羯座 370 票 4%
> >第 5名 水瓶座 790 票 9% 第11名 雙魚座 349 票 4%
> >第 6名 牡羊座 585 票 7% 第12名 處女座 327 票 3%
> >
> >Q20：哪個星座的男生最被動？
> >
> >第 1名 金牛座 918 票 15% 第 7名 水瓶座 412 票 6%
> >第 2名 魔羯座 770 票 13% 第 8名 天蠍座 406 票 6%
> >第 3名 處女座 766 票 12% 第 9名 射手座 330 票 5%
> >第 4名 巨蟹座 663 票 11% 第10名 獅子座 246 票 4%
> >第 5名 天秤座 481 票 8% 第11名 牡羊座 233 票 3%
> >第 6名 雙魚座 481 票 8% 第12名 雙子座 209 票 3%
> >
> >Q21：哪個星座的人最喜歡流浪？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 1,043 票 30% 第 7名 牡羊座 176 票 5%
> >第 2名 水瓶座 607 票 17% 第 8名 魔羯座 151 票 4%
> >第 3名 雙子座 368 票 10% 第 9名 獅子座 139 票 4%
> >第 4名 雙魚座 240 票 7% 第10名 金牛座 113 票 3%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 196 票 5% 第11名 巨蟹座 92 票 2%
> >第 6名 天秤座 195 票 5% 第12名 處女座 90 票 2%
> >
> >Q22：哪個星座的人最重視朋友？
> >
> >第 1名 水瓶座 1,279 票 15% 第 7名 天秤座 530 票 6%
> >第 2名 處女座 1,246 票 15% 第 8名 獅子座 504 票 6%
> >第 3名 魔羯座 1,081 票 13% 第 9名 雙子座 423 票 5%
> >第 4名 巨蟹座 846 票 10% 第10名 金牛座 383 票 4%
> >第 5名 射手座 665 票 8% 第11名 雙魚座 374 票 4%
> >第 6名 天蠍座 534 票 6% 第12名 牡羊座 370 票 4%
> >
> >Q23：哪個星座的人最不喜歡上課？
> >
> >第 1名 射手座 968 票 19% 第 7名 獅子座 314 票 6%
> >第 2名 巨蟹座 851 票 16% 第 8名 天秤座 299 票 5%
> >第 3名 雙子座 504 票 10% 第 9名 天蠍座 286 票 5%
> >第 4名 水瓶座 491 票 9% 第10名 金牛座 214 票 4%
> >第 5名 雙魚座 380 票 7% 第11名 處女座 212 票 4%
> >第 6名 牡羊座 318 票 6% 第12名 魔羯座 199 票 3%
> >
> >Q24：哪個星座男生最容易落淚？
> >
> >第 1名 雙魚座 1,164 票 26% 第 7名 雙子座 208 票 4%
> >第 2名 巨蟹座 689 票 15% 第 8名 金牛座 196 票 4%
> >第 3名 處女座 674 票 15% 第 9名 射手座 190 票 4%
> >第 4名 天蠍座 269 票 6% 第10名 魔羯座 187 票 4%
> >第 5名 天秤座 261 票 5% 第11名 牡羊座 173 票 3%
> >第 6名 水瓶座 236 票 5% 第12名 獅子座 132 票 3%
> >
> >Q25：哪個星座的人最悲觀？
> >
> >第 1名 處女座 750 票 17% 第 7名 天秤座 263 票 6%
> >第 2名 雙魚座 718 票 16% 第 8名 水瓶座 185 票 4%
> >第 3名 巨蟹座 599 票 14% 第 9名 雙子座 122 票 2%
> >第 4名 魔羯座 568 票 13% 第10名 牡羊座 121 票 2%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 390 票 9% 第11名 獅子座 109 票 2%
> >第 6名 金牛座 316 票 7% 第12名 射手座 98 票 2%
> >
> >Q26：哪個星座的人最八卦？
> >
> >第 1名 雙子座 783 票 20% 第 7名 處女座 251 票 6%
> >第 2名 天秤座 500 票 12% 第 8名 雙魚座 229 票 5%
> >第 3名 射手座 360 票 9% 第 9名 金牛座 228 票 5%
> >第 4名 魔羯座 356 票 9% 第10名 獅子座 221 票 5%
> >第 5名 水瓶座 276 票 7% 第11名 牡羊座 199 票 5%
> >第 6名 天蠍座 271 票 7% 第12名 巨蟹座 184 票 4%
> >
> >Q27：哪個星座最會表現"曖昧不明"的關係？
> >
> >第 1名 雙魚座 885 票 16% 第 7名 金牛座 391 票 7%
> >第 2名 天秤座 697 票 12% 第 8名 處女座 348 票 6%
> >第 3名 水瓶座 608 票 11% 第 9名 巨蟹座 317 票 5%
> >第 4名 雙子座 544 票 10% 第10名 魔羯座 270 票 4%
> >第 5名 天蠍座 506 票 9% 第11名 牡羊座 224 票 4%
> >第 6名 射手座 420 票 7% 第12名 獅子座 213 票 3%
> >
> >Q28：哪個星座的人長的最好看？
> >
> >第 1名 天秤座 1,417 票 22% 第 7名 獅子座 381 票 6%
> >第 2名 天蠍座 791 票 12% 第 8名 雙子座 379 票 6%
> >第 3名 雙魚座 554 票 8% 第 9名 金牛座 376 票 5%
> >第 4名 水瓶座 519 票 8% 第10名 處女座 360 票 5%
> >第 5名 射手座 469 票 7% 第11名 牡羊座 322 票 5%
> >第 6名 巨蟹座 440 票 6% 第12名 魔羯座 308 票 4%
> >
> >Q29：哪個星座的人最有魅力？
> >
> >第 1名 天蠍座 1,331 票 17% 第 7名 魔羯座 558 票 7%
> >第 2名 射手座 1,274 票 16% 第 8名 雙子座 472 票 6%
> >第 3名 天秤座 903 票 11% 第 9名 獅子座 403 票 5%
> >第 4名 牡羊座 667 票 8% 第10名 處女座 306 票 3%
> >第 5名 雙魚座 659 票 8% 第11名 金牛座 285 票 3%
> >第 6名 水瓶座 577 票 7% 第12名 巨蟹座 285 票 3%
> >
> >Q30：哪個星座的人最臭屁？
> >
> >第 1名 獅子座 2,205 票 34% 第 7名 天秤座 385 票 6%
> >第 2名 射手座 579 票 9% 第 8名 水瓶座 307 票 4%
> >第 3名 天蠍座 553 票 8% 第 9名 魔羯座 245 票 3%
> >第 4名 雙魚座 543 票 8% 第10名 金牛座 244 票 3%
> >第 5名 雙子座 496 票 7% 第11名 處女座 244 票 3%

Haha.

On this nice Friday morning where many people are stuck in school with books and teachers, I'm on the computer typing this out, enjoying the very slight breeze coming through my brother's window. It would not have been possible without the Polling Day holiday which the school decided to put it today, although I should say it makes no difference because now that there's no more PE for the year2s, my typical Friday ends at 9.15am.

The past 2 days were windy days. People who have been to my house before will know that my living room window is unobstructed, to the point that you can spot me poking my head out from the polytechnic, and my mother, for some reason, loves strong winds. So with the window opened so wide (even the grills were pushed to the sides) that a human can easily jump out of it (don't worry I'm not doing that), the living room was really typhoon yesterday.

I did not really slack through the past few days, but I am still trying to get myself into mugging mode. I slept through Wednesday afternoon, waking up in time to catch the news and the NDP.

And so, my father fixed the spoilt computer, which turned out to be a damaged power supply box. Although no one is using (and wants to use) that computer anymore, he is still fiddling around with it, even as my brother and I are finalising the specs for the new one we are buying. Heh.

Not too long ago, he put into use his awesome skills of taking things-that-others-have-thrown-away again, returning home one night with two graphics cards. The Geforce2 card is apparently spoilt, but the Geforce4 (!) one is still working. He plugged it into that P3 450 comp, which is like a champion horse pulling a cart.

To the person who wants that Geforce4 card, its only a MX, not a Ti. And its only 64mb.

Since I'm here, I might as well do some shameless advertising. Although I think no one will buy, I do hope miracles will happen. Haha. Please support me!

VJC is organising a carnival called Family 3, which is basically a day of fun "to create awareness for elderly needs and the importance of family life and intergenerational dialogue". Proceeds from this carnival will go to the Singapore Action Group Of Elders (SAGE). (Don't worry its not N*F)

This carnival will be held on 2th Sep (one day after Teachers' day, which is the saturday of the one week break.), time from 9am to 4pm, at VJC.

There will be stuff like:

1. a london train ride

2. a mini viking

3. a super dog twister ( for older kids and adults)

4. A dunking machine

5.bouncy castles and a titanic slide

6 A kiddie corner

7.sports games with an intergenerational element designed by our very own Sports groups

8. massage services by a massage academy

9. Art jamming- you can paint as a family on a decent sized canvas and get to take your artwork home for a fee. All materials are included.

10.Talks. We have a chiropractor Dr. Terence Yap who will give a talk on managing and preventing joint/spinal pain, a nutritionist speaking on how to eat right and stay healthy, a senior resident physician from SGH speaking on staying healthy and active through the years and a psychologist speaking on parent child communication.

11. performances by our cca groups

12. flea market stalls

13. external vendors for food on top of our canteen food

14. Story-telling sessions by veteran story-tellers.

Guest-of-honour is Mr Matthias Yao, Mayor of South East CDC.

Why am I saying all these? Because I am supposed to sell a booklet of coupons. It cost 5 bucks each, which is used for buying food, drinks and games (I think). There is also a lucky draw coupon.
So hor, if possible please support me k? Haha. Ya I know have to study for prelims but its important to spend time with your families also right? Somemore can help elderly leh!

Its typhoon in my living room again.

I will have to cut down on my frequency of blogging, maybe even using the computer, because I get tired easily from staring at monitor screens (I'm still using CRT =( ), and if I get tired I can't study liaox. Many others have already begun their preparations, so I have to catch up before its too late.

The windows are closed now, after the winds blew my mother's spectacles from the table to the floor.

[ADDON]

I thought this year's NDP paled compared to the previous years. Last year there were celebrations at the heartlands, complete with fighter jets making their way down to the heartlands just to make the residents happy (With such tight airspace, that was a challenge, esp the fact that Tampines is so near the airport), there was some online thingy which let people at the stadium moblog entries in, and the fireworks then were much more magificant. Even my mother asked how come this year's performance so little.

[/ADDON]

And so, I just watched the National Day Parade on TV. Its all the usual stuff..guard-of-honour, bomb burst, performances, national anthem, fireworks, etc. Yet I still kept myself glued to the television, making sure I do not miss out any moment of the Parade.

I have never watched a Parade live at the stadium or Padang before, save for the National Education Show in Primary 5. That one, I missed the pre-parade segment and had just stepped in when the jets flew past, because of huge jams at the gates. However, watching on TV is not too bad either.

It has always been a huge contradiction for me when it comes to Singapore. I have always hated the exam-oriented environment and mindset that Singapore has shaped in us, the way the opposition is suppressed, the way media is controlled, the high cost and standards of living, and how old buildings are
torn down or restored to beyond recognition, just to keep tourists coming in.

But when I looked back, I have to agree that education forms the best years of my life, its in these schools that I made all the good friends, met all the influential teachers, picked up all the knowledge, and ultimately shaped me into what I am today. I never liked the stress that came with the examinations and competition, but it is this stress that allowed me to stand strong despite all the pressure.

Opposition is suppressed, media is controlled, but I guess that is what allowed Singapore to stay clear of the political crisises that plagued other countries. Cost and standards of livings are indeed high, but I think if one can be easily content that should not be a problem.

Singapore has been an open economy, and we depend highly on foreign markets for our survival. We do not have a culture to start with, so we took all the cultures others brought in, mix them together, and call it our own. Its quite unique in some sense.

Singapore, no matter how bad it is, is the place I grew up in, has provided me a safe environment such that I do not have to worry about basic needs, allowing me to concentrate on what my counterparts in poorer countries consider as luxuries. I have to return this favour in some way or other. I need to start
dreaming.

As Singapore begins its 42nd year of nation building, I do hope that Singapore will continue to thrive. Like what I read somewhere in the papers today, Singapore has not yet found a balance between conservation and development. I hope more can be done in keeping our dying cultures alive (I have not seen a makeshift stage showing Teochew opera for ages), and find something that no other country has. Or we will just be another America. I'm actually quite sick of watching local celebrities introducing Singapore to the world with the same old "Zoo, Birdpark, Sentosa, Hainanese Chicken Rice, Rojak, Chilli Crab".

And oh, more freedom please.

Last but not least, I agree with one Indian said in one of the clips shown during tonight's Parade. Singaporeans need to relax. Ha.

You can say I am a victim fallen to government propaganda (maybe I really am), but I hope I'm not too late to say

Happy Birthday Singapore.

Last Saturday morning I went to school to help with the filming of Alfas Challenge. It was a workshop to help students do better during interviews when applying for scholarships, and the teacher-in-charge asked Year2 iCOMP Infocomm Club students to film instead of the Year1s so that more Year2s can benefit from the workshop, especially that the rest have to pay 30 bucks for the whole day event.

Someone else doing better in academics should have went instead of me.

Anyway our task was to flim the mock interviews so that participants could review their performance later in the afternoon. It got boring soon afterwards, because it was very repetitive.

I think interviews are not at all a breeze to go through. There's actually a very thin line between being confident and being boastful. Its not easy to even be confident in an interview, firstly because its really very frightening to talk in front of a panel, especially when that simple talk is going to decide your future, and secondly because saying too much makes people think that you are haolian-ing.

So far the most confident person that I have ever come across is still the senior who trained me in competitive programming, and throughout the entire interview only one person came close to him - my batch's student council president.

I guess the only thing I benefitted from the entire workshop was the free food during the tea break and lunch.

Saturday night was spent at Nanyang Junior College, where I attended the Nanyang Film Festival to support a friend, whose boyfriend happened to be the director of all three short films O.O, two in Chinese, one in English. I guess the event was not too bad, considering that this is the first time, though there is alot of room for improvement.

Video is becoming a competitive area for junior colleges. Haha. iCOMP Infocomm Club should organise one too.

Today was National Day celebrations. We were allowed to come in red or white tops, but in the end I wore my uniform instead because I could not find a decent red or white shirt.

Celebrations started at the parade square where several uniformed group students, under the command of a parade commander who seemed to be weaker compared to the Katong Convent counterpart across the canal, marched in holding the National Day and College flags, accomapnied by house committee and their banners.

I was surprised to see my former Maths teacher donning the SCDF uniform, standing on the podium saying National Day related stuff which I think I have heard a thousand times before. I didn't know he was from the SCDF.

Celebrations was quite a letdown. There was obviously a lack in coordination, and the sound system once again disappointed us, because no one bothered to fix it. Victorians managed to reduce some of the awkwardness by trying to sing loudly during the songs and laugh and clap as much as possible during the two videos. I should say that the items put up were still not bad if one had paid close attention to it. I liked the harmonica band. The students council has to improve.

Went home facing the four walls after we were dismissed, because no one wanted to. I wonder why people like to go home so much. Maybe its just me.

On my way home I spotted AHS people all over the Marine Parade area. According to my friend they had their 2.4km run today.

Wow. So what happened to their National Day celebrations? Is that another ingenious idea that the new principal came up with to reduce the number of holidays they have so they can mug more?

Backtracking to Sunday I was drinking my milo in the late morning when I received a phone call from my mother. She fell down, and because she tried to use her hands to break the fall, she broke her wrist. When I reached my mother I saw a very obvious hump on her wrist.

At the hospital it was waiting, waiting, and more waiting. The first was waiting for the nurse in the consultation room to decide that my mother needs an X ray before she could see the doctor. The second was waiting for the X-ray. The third was waiting for our turn to see the doctor.

Apparently I had to pass the X-rays over to the doctor first before seeing her, but I didn't know that until my brother came from home and told me that I should not be holding the X-rays. So we waited for half-an-hour for nothing.

My mother was shivering very seriously, so we decided to cut the queue abit. The doctor decided that she needed an operation and a stay at the hospital. So after more waiting at the Nurses' Station and subsequently the Admissions counter, she was admitted into a B2 bed.

The most intolerable thing throughout the entire wait, was actually the painful look on her face, coupled with the sense of helplessness I had.

By the time she got to the bed her shivering was gone, and she looked better than the battered body earlier on. I think the shivering was more of a psychological thingy than a physical one. I vaguely remembered myself shivering similarly when I went to the hospital in the wee hours of the morning due to very serious gastric pains.

The following day in school, I was surprised to receive a call from my brother that my mother has been discharged and was at home already. So fast? I thought.
It turned out that the doctor somehow fixed her broken bone back into the original position, and put her arm into a cast, asking her to go back again another day. Resting at home is more cost-saving than staying in the ward.

Help came mainly from my aunt's family. A fully automated washing machine was in my house on Tuesday, courtesy of my cousin. (Huh? Isn't it a standard feature in everyone's homes? Nah..the one is my house was the 1990-era National semi-automated type. I don't think anyone of you have seen a washing machine that's green in colour before have you?)

Then my aunt cooked dinner for us in the past few days, because none of us could squeeze out the time to.

My mother looked the same in the past few days. She doesn't show signs of improving actually. Hopefully she will be alright soon.

Not that I am bad-mouthing her or something, but at her age, I have a feeling that this will not be the last time. Haix.

This aside, I finally found a torrent client that can work fine with my computer! There are loads of Linux-based torrent clients around, but because I have screwed up Python and Java, Bittorrent and Azureus are out. Today I found a C++ based torrent client called rTorrent, which is a text-based one. Downloads, however, are slow, just like the others.

A new error message has just appeared in my hp. Pressing the menu button will throw up a message which says:

DynamicMenuError
Errors occur in the menu.ml file. This may render the menu unusable.

After pressing OK it still brings me to the menu. But the shortcut buttons and links can no longer work anymore.

And so, next week is National Day week. Besides Monday which is lessons as usual, the rest are without lessons. Friday is a holiday because its our Polling Day holiday. Then the teachers are capitalising on this by giving out tons of homework. Argh.

Prelims is coming.

Tomorrow will be a busy day.

And so today was the VJC Careers, Higher Education and Scholarship Fair 2006.

They gathered the three local universities, numerous government and government-linked agencies, and education centres which handle overseas education, to set up booths in college, and promote their scholarships to us. Lessons ended at 1.20pm for all, and included a lucky draw with a top prize of an Ipod Nano to attract crowds. Within the first hour my hands were full of bags and brochures belonging to the different agencies.

I don't have many choices; 'S' Papers and myopias less than 500 degrees in either eye are minimum requirements for most scholarships. I just went round with my friends grabbing their brochures and free gifts. My haul at the end of the day included 1 handphone pouch, 1 notebook, 2 posters, 3 paper bags, 5 pens, and many, many brochures screaming why I should pick them.

Also listened to 3 talks, one by the British Council, one by IDA (which turned out to be the same presentations as the previous two times I went), and one by MINDEF (which was rather slipshod =x).

After attending the fair today, I am once again wondering if I should study at an overseas university or if I should just study at a local university. No doubt an overseas education sounds attractive, but I can only go for one if and only if I am able to get a scholarship. Without 'S' Papers (and even 4 As to start with) or "outstanding CCA records" to shout about, scholarship probability is nearly zero. Then US and UK universities require reports from my teachers, and I don't have anything good for them to write about. Just the thought of my teachers spending hours with images of me in their heads while they try to cook up something to deceive those admissions officers is enough to make me feel....weird. Its like, wasting their time.

Then there are essays to write and interviews to attend. My GP is rubbish, and I really can't talk to strangers. Group discussions where examiners try to weed out quiet ones and take in vocal ones are the worst. I will be the first to be shown the door.

So when I receive the letter to thank me for applying and wish me all the best in my future endeavours, I will then start crying my heart and soul out in my bed, regretting why I had not studied harder in my JC days and tried harder to win at competitions. After that, I will just spend the next three/four years quieting studying some computer science course, graduating without anyone noticing, then join some small company located at a corner of some office building as a boring programmer, and worked till the day I die.

Haha. Sorry you have just wasted some time reading some crap.

I'm not looking down on local universities by saying that the above would not happen if I study overseas. My point is that it is quite likely my life will end up as boring as above (please la, all that talk about me becoming some godlike boss is shit.), so I might as well not trouble the army of teachers. I can die more quietly without anyone knowing. Also I hate the sight of some invisible guardian popping out to ask me why I had not strived to get better results when I had the chance.

I'm not sure myself what I am trying to say. I'm just pouring out everything that's running across my mind now. I'm very confused.

Maybe I am typing all these because I am upset by my disappointing performace in my past 18 years of life (that can stretch into one essay) and I really hope that my future will not be as dull anymore. Maybe. Hope.

I have not taken SAT. And I will definitely fail if I should take one, and waste that 100 bucks away.

I have always ignored those announcements and reminders and deadlines about filling up online forms or attending scholarship talks or whatever. Now that it caught my attention, I don't have much time. Should I start doing them now, it will only bring the tutors shock waves that I am thinking of university now when the rest of the population have done that half a year ago, and me, an array of scoldings and sarcastic remarks for not doing it earlier.

While many people have more or less decided their future academic path, and now concentrating hard working towards that goal, I am still a wondering soul in the thick fog.